My eldest son said this to me a few years ago, Reader. It hit right in my heart.

He said it in jest, but he had no idea what that meant for me.

To understand why, we need to go back about 15 years.

(Cue movie rewind with a cool song to get the feels!)

I was a single mum for nearly 10 years.

Following the horrendous divorce, I was working full time, had my three kids full time, and was solely financially responsible for them in every way.

I'm not sure how I did it back then, but I kept going and kept life together for us all.

My bestie once said to me that she didn't understand why I never sat down to eat dinner! The kids sat on one side of the bench, and I stood on the other in the kitchen, routinely and non-creatively scoffing my dinner so that I could clean up just as fast to finally sit down each night.

Meals and school lunches became a chore. (I'm a pretty good cook when I feel inspired, but there's nothing like single parenting while working full time to take the romance out of it.)

I kept meals simple and as balanced as possible. I wasn't perfect, but my kids got everything they needed.

One easy meal the kids enjoyed after sport practice was egg and bacon sandwiches.

I used to buy the bulk budget bacon. I had to make things go as far as I could!

This is what my son was referring to, Reader. He went on to explain to me that for a while as an adult, he avoided eating bacon completely.

If only he knew what that bacon represented!

We do this as parents.

We decide for them as best we can, without knowing or asking if that's what they need.

Most of the time, we are oblivious because we are just trying to figure out life.

It's the same for food as it is habits and behaviours.

Our kids get caught up in our personalities and expectations. We raise them the best we can, but it's not always in their best interests.

Our kids are different from us, and each other. It's not one size fits all. They are complex beings, as are we, and we are all navigating our way through this maze that is humanism.

My point in all this is that as parents, we don't always know what's best for our kids. We have to give them space to figure it out and be there to support them without judgement or conditions.

I'm happy to share that my son eats bacon again. He healed from his bacon trauma, and has decided which cut is best for him!

He doesn't need to know all the hidden meanings behind why I felt momentarily devastated after what he said. That was my wound to heal.

Next time you're tempted to tell your kids how to fix something, think of my bacon moment and instead ask them what they need. And listen.

They need your support more than your opinion, and they'll appreciate you for it.

And if you feed your kids bacon, consider spending a little more to get the quality brand - just in case!

Got a parenting story similar to mine, Reader? Please do reply and let me know.

Chat soon.

Ali x

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